Skip to main content

What's Saving Me ... Right Now (On Grace)


I don’t do well with solitude. I am not an introvert. I excel at talking to people about anything (or maybe even to rocks, and walls, and dogs, and anything else that will listen).

I keep myself busy. Full-time work, full-time Mommy, full-time wife, full-time seminary student, full-time ordination seeker. I balance so many things that sometimes I wonder how I find the time and space to get it all done. I juggle it all and oftentimes leave myself out of the mix.

People around me often ask, “How do you do it?” In which, I answer ... "I don’t know" 

But, really. I do know the answer. 

It’s Grace.

And it’s always been Grace. Even when I back my car into my own mailbox and am forced to stay home from work … it’s grace letting me spend a extra day with the little boy I love. Even when I’ve felt like my husband and I couldn't afford to go out for our anniversary, it’s Grace in a giftcard from a friend. Even when I don’t think I need time for me, when I don’t want to disconnect from all the things I love to do, it’s Grace that brought me to a dear mentor’s beach house to finish writing my ordination paperwork.

Sarah Bessey asked over on her blog, “What’s Saving Your Life Right Now?” And for days, I couldn’t come up with an answer. But, the answer is and always has been grace. The waves are crashing on the shore and I’ve got nothing but this night to write until my hearts content. To pour out who I really am to those who want to know how and why I’m called to follow God into the homes of the least of these. My deadline is next week, so there's no rush, it’s a slow time for me. It’s the space that I had been craving for me, but didn’t realize I needed. Sure, I could have gotten it all done without this generous gift. But God’s grace doesn’t work like that … grace shows up where you least expect it.

I’ll return to my family tomorrow. Hopefully with all my paperwork finished, but more importantly I’ll be ready to do it all again. To give the million facets of my life all of me until I’m worn out again and God, in his wisdom, provides again a time and place for me to sit. Quiet. Restful. Full of Grace.

What is saving my life … right now?

This View:


And Grace.

Comments

Sarah Bessey said…
That view is stunning, Mary. Beautiful post.

Popular posts from this blog

Golden Slumbers (On God & Jude @ 15 Months)

Golden slumbers fill your eyes. Smiles awake you when you rise. Sleep pretty darling do not cry. And I will sing a lullabye.— Golden Slumbers, The Beatles



My child does not sleep. He’s a sweet little 15-month-old who thinks sleeping through the night is for wimps. In fact, in his little mind, it’s not even necessary. I have read every book, asked seasoned parents, and even thought about just letting him cry-it-out, alone in his room, but nothing seems to work. Our bedtime routine happens like this: Dinner time at 5:30, it’s usually something yummy like green beans with turkey or mashed potatoes with ham, followed by a tall glass of milk and maybe some yogurt for dessert. After filling his cute little tummy, it’s on to bath time where we sink a thousand rubber duckys into a pool of bubbles while dumping cups of water out of the tub onto the tile. Then it’s off to the nursery where we read “Goodnight Moon,” sing a special lullaby, and begin the rocking to sleep. Now, all the parenting e…

Hey Jude!

Jude is finally here! I have SO much to say and so many pictures to share! But, I'll try to not ramble on too much and just give you the facts about my little perfect little boy!


To the Hospital:Here we are, our little family before Jude, on Wednesday morning May 26. I was nervous going in but I knew that by the end of the day our little boy would be here and so it calmed my nerves a little bit. We ended up getting to the hospital a little late because I was moving so slow, but thankfully they still let us in! : )

Hospital Time:
So, here I am after we got all checked in. They would only allow Martin back in the room with me so he took this shot, my last pregnant belly shot with Jude. Having a scheduled c-section still doesn't prepare you for how scary it all is. At least when you go into "labor" there isn't time to really think about the "What ifs" but sitting there I was nervous and scared and afraid of everything that could go wrong in a c-section. They …

6-Ten Yoga

--> 6:10 a.m. Yoga club. Well, that’s what I’ve named us anyway. My friend Jenny (who also happens to be our child care provider, homeschool expert and all around great person) and I decided to start going to Yoga at 6 a.m. because an awesome woman in the community was offering free classes.
Okay, so they aren’t really free. They are “donation” based – but a donation is far better than paying $100 a month for the gym in the off chance I’ll get up. Plus – I feel a lot guiltier skipping out on the “free” yoga because this sweet woman is giving her time to a small group of women and doesn’t expect to be paid for it. I WANT to go so that she gets a donation. It’s a weird reasoning.
Anyway. We get up at 5:30 a.m. after probably only sleeping 4 hours (Jenny has four kids and I have two, so there isn’t a whole lot of hours to get to ourselves so going to bed early is always out!) and we drive the 15 minutes over to the lake front park to be there by 6:10.
The sky is still dark when …